Lilypie Pregnancy tickers

Lilypie Pregnancy tickers

Sunday, August 1, 2010

Shitty weekend

Well this was a shitty weekend...

~ My aunt passed away yesterday. She was 58. Out of 7 kids... only 2 remain on my dads side of the family. The 2 that are alive live in California. My family is pretty much gone & I hate it. I hate that my son will barely know that part of our family. We aren't sure what caused my aunts death at this point but they are doing an autopsy tomorrow. Apparently she wasn't feeling well and even saw a doctor on Wed. My grandpa hadn't heard from her for a few days so we went to bring her some soup yesterday and found her dead in bed. She lives alone, never been married, no kids. She either had a heart attack as this runs in my family and killed my dad & one of my uncles, or it was a mixture of her blood pressure meds & booze. She'd become quite an alcoholic since my grandma's death a few years ago, it just killed my aunt. She was miserable and unhappy... I know she's in a better place but I hate that she died all alone. She was a great aunt, we had so much fun w/her as kids but after loosing all her siblings & her mom it just slowly killed her. Her visitation will probably be Wed w/funeral on Thurs.

~ A girl from work who is due about 5 weeks after me ended up in the hospital last night. She was having contractions & come to find out it was a horrible UTI. They gave her meds to stop the contractions but she is now on bed rest for at least 2 weeks. Thank god her and baby are doing good right now though. How scary.

~ What does all of this mean for me? Well I'll be working my ass off next week because we will be short handed, so no more PT & resting for me. And I'll have a funeral to work around as well. All the while I could go into labor at any minute. I'm stressed and fucking upset. This wasn't how things were supposed to be. I'm tired, I'm sore and I want to rest. I'm trying to stay calm because I don't want to go into labor right now, I can't. I was so afraid I would last night... I didn't want Collins birth to be the day of my aunts death, and I don't want to miss the funeral either. Fuck, I shouldn't have to worry about this shit. I'm supposed to be happy and excited right now and all I want to do is fucking cry.

10 comments:

elephantscanremember said...

(hugs) I am very sorry to hear of your family's loss. I hope and pray that God will give you all comfort.

elephantscanremember said...

I hope you can find a way to get some rest. Take it as easy as you can, ok? We're here for you anytime!

Allison said...

((((Hugs))))) Deep breaths, girl.

My deepest sympathies.

Robin said...

Oh man.. terrible timing. Well, worse than that, it's awful that she died at all. I understand the feeling of the shrinking family all too well. My mom has 7 brothers and we only have 1 of them in our lives now. The others are either dead or pissed off about money issues from my grandmother's estate. It sucks to have had such a big family with lots of cousins, etc, to nothing.

Hang in there and take it one day at a time.. You will probably make it through all of this before Collin comes and then you can just focus on him and healing your heart.

((Hugs))

Tanya said...

((HUGS) I am sorry for your loss and I hope that you will find some comfort and peace even if it is only for a few mins at a time. Thoughts and prayers are with you!

AJ48 said...

I am sorry for your loss. I hope things get a little easier for you. Try not to stress - I know easier said than done. I lost my grandma right before I gave birth to Mackenzie...someone said to me 'when one life ends a new one begins' It made me feel a little better. Hang in there sweetie, things will get better soon!

Julie said...

Oh no, I'm sorry that you are having to go through all of this. I hope that you will still be able to find some to relax during this demanding week.

ssbean said...

I am so sorry about your aunt passing away.
I hate that your coworker is having some complications, it really messes up your "relaxing" here at the end of the pregnancy.
Hopefully Collin will stay put until after the funeral.

Jen said...

Awww sorry you had such a crappy weekend. Hope all goes well for you and your family. Just think, in just a few days you will be meeting your little boy and I'm sure a smile will be on your face.

((((HUGS))))

Sarah said...

I am so sorry for your loss. Hope you can take it easy and rest.