This is an email I just got from my crazy cousin after I told her I couldnt make it to her wedding because we would be doing IVF. What the fuck do I say back to this? I swear I am so fucking pissed off! If she didnt live halfway across the US I'd punch the bitch right in the face!
Thanks for letting me know. I am so very sorry you two are having trouble getting pregnant, but I must warn you against Invitro. No, I had no idea you were thinking of doing anything like that, and I must tell you "Don't!" And here is why. I babysat for several years for a family who decided to do invitro because the father got a vasectomy and the reversal left them trying for a few years to get pregnant taking hormone shots etc etc. They did invitro and she has 2 beautiful twin boys Gibson and Lucas, who I took care of from infant to about age 2. She knew I was a devout Catholic and one day she came to me with tears and her eyes saying that she had been up crying on her knees all night because she had said the act of contrition prayer I had given her, and weighing on her mind was the fact that there are now 6 other embryos in a laboratory that were formed from her egg and his sperm and she didn't know what to do with them. She didn't want to have them all and she wasn't sure she wanted to give them to someone else. I couldn't believe it, what a terrible matter of conscience for a person to have to bear, and all because she wanted another child. I told her she ought to talk to a priest, but the whole thing just makes me sick to my stomach.
I know it must be so hard to be patient. Many of your friends have children, and believe me, I can't even imagine how badly you must want them. I want them too, and I have certainly thought about "what if" i can't. However, I already know invitro is not the answer.
The answer, I believe, is heartfelt fervent, continual prayer to God and sacrifice. That's the answer, and I truly believe if you do this, God will give you a child. Don't put yourself in that position to be responsible for robbing souls from God by creating these babies only to sit in a laboratory and eventually die if no one wants them. What about adoption?
I may not change your mind, but pray about this before you do it, and please take into consideration the grave ramifications of such a decision. Besides, then you could stop wasting your time and money at these fertility clinics and let the Divine Physician (Our Lord) take care of you. I think as soon as you would do that you would get pregnant. As soon as you let go and let God.
God love you and bless you if you will only do His Will. I am going to pray and offer up what I can for you and Jake. Please consider what I have told you. Miss you! Love you!
Take care and hope to see you at the wedding!